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A Day to Contemplate

11/5/2015

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PicturePhoto by Anders Engelbol
Tomorrow would be my daughter's 42nd birthday if she was still here, but she is not.  433 days ago, her depression grew to such a loud crescendo, she succumbed to it. To be honest, it was the most devastating tragedy of my life, and I am still learning how to cope. But this is a day for contemplation, not on my pain,  but on the pain felt by so many when a loved one ceases to exist. 

According to the latest statistics, a person takes their own life every 12.8 minutes in the U.S. That's 112 lives lost every single day. But it's just not their lives that are lost, it's also their creativity, their inspiration, their kindness, generosity, spirit, and love. All things that were unique and special that only that one person in the whole world possessed. Losing that, for anyone, is devastating, but now that I have seen it firsthand, it is the hardest on the ones who were the closest. I don't care whether that is family or friend, it hurts and it keeps on hurting. 

There are numerous books on grief--how to survive it, how to work your way through, how to go forward, and even how to learn not to hate the one who is lost. I've read several, and to be honest, most of them didn't help. What did help, is speaking her name--Dawn. Remembering when she learned to ride her first bike, the birth of her daughters, the love she had for her husband, and her constant "I love you, Mom". So, today, instead of writing I am looking at photos and remembering the joy my daughter brought, and there is 42 years of it. 

Be kind to yourself today.

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    Sherry Alexander

    Dreamer, believer, reader, writer

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